Sexual infidelity is often considered the ultimate betrayal. When a heterosexual couple experiences infidelity and the offense is committed with someone of the same sex, it turns worlds upside down. We expect that our partners will keep our interests in mind even when potential rewards tempt them to break the rules.
Infidelity occurs in the context of both heterosexual and same-sex relationships, although expectations may be different.
The fluidity of our sexual preferences is an established human reality, yet it's one that many people are still afraid to confront or admit.
Those dual truths were never illustrated so clearly as when I conducted a Tinder experiment: What happens when a bisexual man changes his gender on Tinder to "female"?
My heart was beating a little faster as I walked down the hotel hallway.
I had done this plenty of times before, but Mark’s voice had betrayed a different kind of nervous energy than I was accustomed to. I’m often the first trans woman a guy has been with. I like their innocent anxiousness, the relief that washes over them when they see me and realize I’m even more attractive than they hoped.
"I just kept my same photos as a guy, but they still swiped right and started chatting with me," he told me. Heterosexual-identifying men chatting up another guy? But wanted to take things to another level, so I decided to say yes to every man.
I swiped right on hundreds of men looking for women — and in the process, what I saw as an intriguing example of sexual fluidity emerged.: Plenty of men swipe right without even looking, not taking the time to examine the photos, much less the bio.
He opens the door and my doubts are immediately eclipsed by desire: He’s tall, built, incredibly handsome.
"Kevin" is a man in his mid-fifties, married, with two children, one of whom is handicapped.
His wife suspected Kevin's interest in men, and she began to search for clues of his deception.
The results were what you could interpret as sexual fluidity in action.
A gay friend of mine told me that he had slept with a "straight" guy using Tinder by changing the stated gender on his profile to female. I downloaded Tinder (fine, I already had it on my phone — I just opened the app), updated my profile to "female" and uploaded the best selfies my i Phone had to offer. At first I was rather selective, receiving some matches.