The two services used by these individuals were OKCupid and Match.com, two of the largest and most popular dating websites on the Internet.What I learned from carrying out an interview of a female and the interview of a male trying to dig into this intriguing subject was that using the Internet for dating is equally painful for men and for women, but for very different reasons.Around this time two years ago, I created an online dating profile. I wasn’t opposed to dating, but I had exhausted the friends of friends category. She advised me that online dating probably wasn’t the path to a relationship, but it would get me out of my dating rut. I had a busy social life, a job I liked, smart friends, and a general aversion to committed relationships—and no incentive to clear the way for dudes. Then my friend Priscilla—an attractive, normal, and well-socialized young woman—signed up for Ok Cupid.
“You’ll have to be nice to people.” Online dating was, in my bitchy and judgmental estimation, for women who wanted to get married, stat, and were willing to settle for whatever turned up a few clicks away.
A friend forwarded me an article about looks on the dating site Ok Okay, maybe it didn’t blow my mind, but it did validate everything that I’ve ever said about online dating.
I’m going to do my best to summarize– and explain what you can learn from it. 1) Men have a very fair assessment of women’s overall attractiveness.
After coaching women for many years, I already suspected this, but this was a stark realization when you see just how few men you even find to be average looking. Ok Cupid reports that the most attractive women still receive 5X more email than average women and 28X more email than unattractive women.
Literally 2/3 of male messages go to the best looking 1/3 of women.