So here's my guide to the goods and bads of online dating.PROSThey're all single - Yes, until pubs require you to wear a special badge announcing your status, there's always a chance that when you pull au naturel, you'll spend half an hour chatting up someone who turns out to already have a girlfriend and has just been polite/obtuse/rolling around in the massive ego boost of it all. You have tons of choice - Yes, no more once overs of the club, crossing your fingers for someone even adequately attractive to consider having a snog with, or face the more principled but smoochless exit alone. You can afford to be fussy - When you're limited to pulling one of the 100 or so guys in a pub, not all of whom are actually single, or might not actually fancy you (the idiots), you can end up lowering your standards somewhat (I think this is why pubs supply alcohol).Or just another way to explore the hells of dating?Well I'm probably not any kind of expert (um, I'm still single) but I like to think I've learned a few things about it along the way.When he gets an unambiguous refusal – like when he’s chirpsing a girl through her own window and she finally closes the casement against him – we’re supposed to feel bad for him rather than her.Poor Tom, denied his date, embarrassed on the street. How cold of the woman not to let him down with a smile and a suggestion that she would say yes if only she wasn’t unfortunately otherwise taken.Because even though the approach is direct, the negative response is almost always softened.It’s a nervous laugh rather than an outright “no”, or “I have a boyfriend” or “I don’t have a boyfriend but I’m into girls” when Tom persists.
But then, those people probably don't write in excruciating detail about their love/sex life in a national magazine, so I'm not going to be quite as coy about admitting - I ONLINE DATE.Right now, you’re probably visualizing which section of your phone it is where you tuck away that boxed orange flame.Perhaps, instead you’re considering your maybe-embarrassing and definitely-impressive swiper to swipee ratio.It’s really hard to tell; some people who have met on the site have just gone on one date, while others have gone on to get married and have children together. I’ve given out my phone number on this app a few times with every intention of following through to meeting someone.After having deleted the app probably more times than I’ve ever swiped right, I’ve realized it should be needless to say that one shouldn’t be ashamed to be looking for something – anything. Whether the actual number of times seems like too many or really not enough, I can’t help but feel someone out there is going to judge it for its cover story.With online dating, at least you know they're all single. Here you have thousands of men, of all looks, ages, jobs and interests to choose from, and a simple like/wink/click with which to signal your interest (way easier than that whole look, look away, look back, is he looking? But online, when you have hundreds of guys asking you out, you'll ignore most (sozzages), reply to several, but only really consider dating a few (in strictly ranked order). You can pre-vet them - Aside from the actually being single thing, you can suss out loads about them before you actually go on a date - from stuff in common (music, films, a love of eggs florentine), to politics and basic values. I like to have a phonecall too, just to make things less awks/work out if they have an annoying laugh/pass the idiot test.